hello-the-future:

therajill:

ninfia:

Do you ever have that moment when a kid is looking at you and you realize that they’re looking at you as a grown up? Then its like no child im a children too, dont. Im sorry my outward appearance confuses you.

I’m sorry my outward appearance and standard behaviors confuse you. I know I’m an adult because I don’t have to ask for cookies. I just give them to myself.

…and then I dunk the cookies in wine while watching as much TV as I want…

flyartproductions:

Icarus: And all the girls say I’m pretty fly—
Daedalus: For a white guy.

Icarus and Daedalus (c. 1869), Frederic Leighton / Pretty Fly (For a White Guy), The Offspring

tuc-ficprompts:

malicemidnight:

sapphirebones:

jaacknasty:

Probably the best 6 seconds ever. 

i fucking lost it

fUC K

OMG IM LAUGHING SO HARD RN HIS FACE WAS ONE OF PURE TERROR OHMYGOD

daarionaharis:

i think every big titty + lil titty friendship has wished they could average out their titties between them

teamlazy18:

Break my heart geno